"The Making and Un-making of a Marine"

I killed for you. You killed for me.

a poem

By Larry Winters and Paula Griffen

I killed for you.

You killed for me

You may not have asked me to, but I killed for you.

I didn't ask you to, but you killed for me.

I didn't ask to go to Vietnam. (War)

I didn't ask you to go to Vietnam.(War)

I didn't support the War.

I wasn't sure where or what War was.

Still I killed for you and for me.

Still you killed for me.

I killed for you, while you paid your taxes.

You killed for me when I was 12 years old.

You watched me kill on TV, while you were eating cheese

burgers.

You killed for me while I played make believe with my friends

and dreamed of who I'd someday marry.

I killed for you. While you were protesting that I was killing

for you,

You killed for me as I overheard the news of the growing

number of lives lost and subconsciously wondered about

the ache in my parents hearts.
I killed for you. While you avoided the draft,

while you ran off to Canada,

You killed for me while I rode my bicycle, swam and went to

church without fear.

I killed for you as you waited in the line at the supermarket,

when you were out getting drunk,

after you got your first good job after college,

while you enjoyed free love, I was killing for you.

You killed for me as I worried about my wrist turning green,

instead of about the soldier whose name was

etched into the band I wore. As I cheered for my football team

and the man on the moon, but not for you, you killed for me.

I have carried pain for you.

You have carried pain for me.

Guilt for you.

Guilt for me.

Shame for you.

Shame for me.

For all the killing I did for you.

For all the killing you did for me.

When I came home, you expected me to heal for you.

To get on with my life for you.

To be productive for you.

To marry you.

To raise children for you.

And most of all to forget for you.

When you came home I didn't notice,

It's taken me 37 years to realize you were gone.

I'm deeply sorry for the years of suffering you've endured, and I

weep, knowing the pain in your soldier heart ... because you

killed for me.

Early in 2008 Paula Griffen "read one of Larry's poems and with her creativity added a response voice that captured her experiences as a young girl during the Vietnam war." - Larry Winters

Hear the poem read by Larry and Helise Winters: